October 2, 2012

King Phillip's Coronation



The day has finally come.

Everbody - and I mean everybody - knew it was only a matter of time.  I knew, you knew, the drunk redneck in section 515, row X knew.  Bill Lazor knew.  Mike London knew.  Phillip Sims knew.  And I think Mike Rocco knew, as well.

Which is why Rock lost the two things that made his pop-gun arm effective: his accuracy on the short stuff, and his mental fortitude.  With the doomsday clock ticking down on his starter status, he clearly pressed, and he obviously entered into a very fragile state of mind.  Two backbreaking interceptions in the second half against LaTech, and the coronation commenced.

All Hail Phillip Sims!  All Hail the King!

Tapclick the play button, absorb, and enjoy...



The effortless flick that goes 40 yards downfield.  The tight spiral.  The noots to chuck it deep.  The moxie.  The confidence.  The "it" factor.  The "X" factor.  The "max" factor.

But let's not get ahead of ourselves here!

Sims is going to struggle.  He's still a woefully inexperienced college quarterback.  He's going to make bad reads and miss easy throws.  He's going to eschew what's free and available in favor of more risky options downfield.  He's going to botch hand-offs and bungle dump-offs.  He's going to get strip sacked and he's going to throw interceptions.  He's going to reign over an offense that experiences growing pains and [at times] will sputter worse than it did with Rocco.  It's not going to be perfect; far from it!

But the effect of Sims under center is still going to be great.  The deep passing game is now an option, and because of that, the safeties will need to stay out of the box, which will open up our running game.  The receivers will be playing with a bit more pep and verve, knowing that big strike is just a 50-yard dart throw away.  When your quarterback is the man with the golden gun, tactical laser strikes are now possible.  The mass effect of starting Sims will be impossible to quantify, but it should be easy to see.

This is what Virginia Football and her adoring fans just received:


That's a shot of adrenaline, straight to the heart.  (By the way, Vincent Vega = Mike London and Lance = Bill Lazor.)  You'll notice that Mrs. Mia Wallace is still hot mess after all of this, but at least she's up and alert.  This is a metaphor I really like and enjoy.  And what we're about to see with Sims at QB is definitely going to be "fuckin' trippy."


Anyway, Phillip Sims is our new starting quarterback.  Amen and Hallelujah.

All Hail Phillip Sims!  All Hail the King!


8 comments:

  1. WHY AM I EXCITED WHEN THEY'LL ONLY CRUSH ME AGAIN

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  2. Pulp Fiction analogy is SO GOOD.

    READY. Ready for excitement on offense. I'll take a roller coaster over The Flight of Peter Pan any day.

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  3. Someone should have told HS Phillip not to use the porn music in his highlights. OR MAYBE IT'S PERFECT

    So pumped.

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  4. Yup that Pulp Fiction biz was excellent.

    Can't wait to see us upset Tech in November. U heard it here first!

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  5. And I see we've got a 4-star LB coming down from Gilman. Looks like the coaching staff has got a little pipeline going there...

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  6. I guess I just don't understand why we waited so long. Why the loyalty to Rocco?

    Is it because of last year? Yeah he looked real competent at times but he's never lit the world on fire.

    Is it a recruiting thing (don't want to throw our guys under the bus so publicly)? Don't recruits tend to like better teams?

    Did he legitimately outperform Sims in TC? I find that tough to swallow, but I guess I wasn't there.

    What I'm driving at is that there's been a clear assumption from day one that A) Sims > Rock and B) Sims is the immediate future at QB. We didn't bring the dude in to not play; why torpedo the 2012 season -THERE I SAID IT- and all of 2011's momentum in the name of loyalty to a guy who, on the best days and with the wind at his back, is sometimes capable of not making me want to punch my television?

    Stupid anecdote: in Madden, I have a lifelong rivalry with the estimable TJ Bateman. This past season my preferred Madden team was the Seattle Seahawks as led by Charlie "The Truth" Whitehurst. The stupid game always wanted to start Tavaris Jackson just because his rating was 12 points higher or whatever. So I would start him on a shorter and shorter leash, until after seven or eight games it ended on the shortest of all- first pass that isn't a TD, and Whitehurst is in. This ever-shortening leash is, I think, the kind of system Rocco should have been on, IF HE HAD TO START AT ALL. And if he was on such a program, he had too much play in the beginning, as will be indicated on the headstone of the 2012 season.

    This indecision has breached, however slightly, the hull of the cruise ship I have oddly opted to represent my trust in Mike London. Let's hope with Sims at the helm we can get it back to shore for repairs, preferably in time for the voyage to Blacksburg God, nautical metaphors are just the pits.

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  7. Sims is the future, so starting the season with Rocco was the correct move. The two possibilities were: 1) Rocco is good and we win; 2) Rocco sucks and we get to move on to Sims permanently.

    And no, I don't think Rocco being good and us losing or Rocco sucking and us winning were actual possibilities.

    London played this one well.

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  8. And I know this has been covered before, but I just wanted to get this out there: Rocco was playing with all of Sims' downside but none of his upside.

    Definitely the time to make a change.

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