Wahooze Picks Week 12

Wow. What a week last week turned out to be for our picks. Not only did every single person miss on both of their supposed "locks," but I managed to go 0-fer the entire week. I'm going to store this right up there with the Lions' loss last week in the "never ever remember/mention/dwell on" file. We're moving on.

Last Week's Scores

Pierce - 0 (This is why I should never bet on sports)

Kendall - 1

Guest Picker - 4

Mike - 4

The Standings

Pierce - 82 (Still winning)

Guests - 80

Kendall - 77

Mike - 73

Yes, your dutiful Wahooze writers, who tirelessly obsess over every stat/result/prediction in the sports universe each week, are dangerously close to losing the yearly competition to the collective efforts of a bunch of our buddies who focus on their jobs/lives over amateur athletics. Good thing I picked a Hokie for this week's guest: Dennis is my best Hokie friend and it rarely gets in the way of our friendship!

(He's the angry-looking one in the back)

Seriously though, I've known Dennis for an unreasonably long amount of time and couldn't begin to recount all the hours we've spent musing over Xbox, mighty fine alcohols, college sports (and women). Dennis is an avid college football follower and definitely knows his stuff - providing some A+ commentary on his picks this week. He also is a director of a camp on an island off the coast of California (badass). I'm pretty sure he likes it when UVA wins games and he's always cordial when they beat us every year. Plus, he's not a Terp. On to the picks:

3 Points:

UVA @ FSU (-17)

Picking the Wahoos: Kendall, Mike, Pierce (shocking)

Picking the Criminoles: Dennis (equally shocking)

K says: This is a huge line. While I don't really see us winning this game (we're 0-fer in Tallahassee and that FSU pass rush is scary), I think we can run the ball and play enough D to shorten the game and keep it somewhat close. I feel a 24-10 type of loss coming on. Hope I'm wrong!

Dennis says: Unfortunately UVA is playing at Doak Campbell Stadium, the home of history's most insidious sports chant. Mike London's Jackson Ward defense keeps it close for a half, but in the end FSU and that damnable chant pull away with superior skill position players and an overhyped-but-still-good QB in Manuel.

Mike says: Too many points. A lot of FSU's offense is predicated on long passes and option. And we can stop one of those! Line will need to sack up to stop the pass rush but they seem to rise to the challenge in these big games. Not calling an upset, but I will call a close game.

Pierce says: Spread's too high. I think both teams use enough time that there just wont be much of a way for the Noles to pile on the lead. Sure, we could easily be down 21-0 in the 2nd quarter, but I see something more like 27-13 being the final.

1 Point Each:
UNC @ VT (-10.5)

Picking the Cheaters: Nobody!

Picking the Little Brothers: Everybody!

Kendall Says: Carolina plays Tech tough, but the Hokies would like to lock up the Coastal and they are always good on Thursday night.

Dennis Says: It's Lane Stadium on a Thursday night against not-Matt Ryan (yes, I know TJ Yates also beat us on a Thursday night, but we all know we actually lost that game to Ryan Williams). VT covers the spread and continues its domination of the entire state of North Carolina.

Mike Says: Is anyone else super concerned about a QB draw from Logan Thomas? I am. It'll be interesting to see if UNC can buy a D-Line that can shut that down.

Pierce Says: The Heels are pretenders. Have been all season. If we hadn't lost to NCSU, I'd still be sore about this being a conference loss for us. In hindsight, we really did have every opportunity to beat them. Logan Thomas has done a great job of not fucking up recently. Is there an answer for David Wilson anywhere? Honey Badger?

GT (-10) @ Duke
Picking the Worst Defensive Coordinator in Football: Everybody!

Picking the Crybaby Head Coach: Nobody!

Kendall Says: Duke has now climbed to #3 on my list of most hated football programs. Go Wreck!

Dennis Says: Hopefully this game is haymaker-free for the Killer Bees, but they should come out angry and put up an silly number of yards and points against a weak Duke squad.

Mike Says: I hate David Cutcliffe. To the point that I don't even care enough to look up if that's how you actually spell his name. I hope Duke "loses this game" by 50.

Pierce Says: Hey Duke, you're terrible. Go join the MAC.

MD @ Wake (-10.5)
Picking the Worst Head Coach in Football: Nobody!

Picking the Demon Deacons (who I respect): Everybody!

Kendall Says: Wake is mystifying to me this season. But I like the Deacs at home over a rudderless UMD team.

Dennis Says: Picking this one is like betting on turtle racing; it sounds fun, but 10 minutes in everyone is bored and wishing they'd gone to a horse track. Maryland continues its vicious downward spiral (I love when a team's new coach starts criticizing the previous regime's players -- SEE NOTRE DAME) and Wake hopefully can build off a respectable performance in which the refs decided that rules weren't as important as Clemson's season.

Mike Says: I would favor Maryland's opponents by at least 17 every game. They are just god awful. That coaching seat doesn't look like it cooled off too much when Ralph left.

Pierce Says: Whatever will Randy Edsall do without one of his two starting QBs? Lose. By more than usual. This team has given up on their coach, it's a beautiful disaster to watch. Schadenfreude doesn't get much better than this (well, maybe the Republican debates).

Clemson (-7.5) @ NCSU
Picking the Boring Mascots: Everybody!

Picking the Redheaded Stepkids: Nobody! (This is getting repetitive)

Kendall Says: State has to win this game, or they are eliminated from bow, contention. That's going to provide nice motivation, but Clemson is just too talented and the Wolfpack is too flawed.

Dennis Says: I'm considering putting real money on this one. That line is just too good. Russel Wilson continues to be thankful that he's playing in the frozen north, and Mike Glennon continues to remind Hokie fans why we're glad he chose to take his talents to Raleigh.

Mike Says: It's nice watching two Virginia QB's we couldn't land matchup. It's the Al-Groh-Stomping-Your-Balls Bowl. Clemson is much better than NC State and can't afford to go into cruise control this early.

Pierce Says: NCSU might be the most inconsistent team in the ACC this year. However, their "good" isn't anywhere close enough to hang with Clemson's "bad."

BC @ Notre Dame (-24.5)
Picking the Jesuits: Everybody!

Picking the other type(?) of Catholic(I think?): Nobody! Again!

Kendall Says: Boston College is playing a little bit better, and this is essentially their bowl game. I think they'll keep it close, and wouldn't be shocked to see them win the game outright.

Dennis Says: The Fighting Irish just won't have the ball long enough to get that big of a lead. Notre Dame is giving up more than 150yds/game on the ground, and Boston College's offense looks like something from 1937. If only they made both teams wear old-school leather helmets for this game.

Mike Says: BC manages to hold off Notre Dame's signature Venegful Wrath Left with their new defense Catholic Mother's Guilt. It'd be funnier if this wasn't my life. Also that line is absurd.

Pierce Says: Way way way too high of a spread. Notre Dame doesn't really light it up and BC has been playing pretty okay recently. The Irish should win big, but not by 25.

Miami (-1) @ USF

Picking the Dead Program Walking: Kendall, Dennis, Mike

Picking the Scraps Left for the Big East: Pierce

Kendall Says: Revenge game for the Canes.

Dennis Says: Miami is coming off a tough loss and they've still got more talent than almost every team in the country. USF keeps it close for a half, but only for a half.

Mike Says: USF is getting cocky. Miami will put them back in their place.

Pierce Says: The trend of USF screwing with the ACC continues.

2 Points Each:

LOCKS

Kendall:

Vandy (-1.5) @ Tennessee -- I love Vanderbilt. It's a pure joy to be able to pick them - favored - over the Vols.

Cal @ Stanford (-19.5) -- Bounce-back game for Andrew Luck and the Cardinal.

Dennis: (this week's locks are themed with a West Coast slant as I try to become a fan of Western America football. It ain't pretty, so I'm including Oklahoma:)

Oklahoma (-15) @ Baylor - Baylor hasn't stopped an offense since playing Stephen F. Austin in September. First - who or what is Stephen F. Austin? Instead of playing directional schools we've just started playing talented individuals? Second - Oklahoma actually has a defense and would be the #1 team in the country if not for human sacrifice on the part of Texas Tech in exchange for one memorable game.

Arizona @ Arizona St (-10.5) - Sure, it's a rivalry game, but this rivalry is on par with WVU and Marshall. Arizona lost by 19 points to the University of Colorado (which, contrary to any logic, abbreviates its name CU). Arizona State beat that same Colorado team by 34 points. It's hard to see this game ending anywhere within a 10 point spread.

Mike:

PSU @ Ohio St (-6.5)

I feel the horseshoe will be merciless to them. Program tailspin ensues.

Oklahoma (-15) @ Baylor
Sooners might be thinking they can jump back into the national championship picture. Especially with Bedlam still looming. Commence beatdowns the rest of the way.

Pierce:

Vandy (-1.5) @ Tennessee
This is a reach, as Vandy will probably win. But Dooley can't let Rocky Top fall this far, can he? (Sidenote: James Franklin is not the coach at Maryland. Hahahahahahaha)

Southern Cal @ Oregon (-15)

Oregon is looking to run up the score on an overranked team to help their BCS hopes. USC is still coached by Lane Kiffen. Advantage: Ducks.



Welp, there you have it. Basically this week comes down to the 2-point LOCKS. As we're all too scared to go against the more likely pick in the conference games.

Never forget: