Bengals & Panthers

Most of you guys reading this blog know me personally.  And knowing me personally, you know that I've suffered through 24 years of being a die-hard Cincinnati Bengals fan.  That's 24 years... the last two complete decades of which featured exactly two playoff appearances and an 0-2 postseason record.

This past season, while watching an "all in" (see also: signing Terrell Owens) type of season swirl the tank into a 4-12 disaster, I decided that I had hit a wall.  Here's what I posted on my fantasy football message board for my 11-person support group to help me deal with, simply titled Breaking Point:

Guys, I've talked about jumping ship, but I've never seriously considered it. Until now. The only thing keeping me a Bengals fan is my friend Doug, a hat I really love (but is quickly getting worn out), and a #78 jersey hanging in my closet.


I'm thinking about parting ways, and seeking a new NFL team to love. Hopefully one that will bring me happiness, not misery.

Loyalty is sacred in my mind, but I honestly don't think I can take any more of this shit.

I need someone to talk me back off the ledge. And if you can't do it, I'm taking recommendations on a new team to follow. My rules are simple: good owner and management, but no long history of success and no Super Bowl wins. I'm not a frontrunner.

I might jump ship, I might not, but life is too short and the NFL is too awesome to waste it waiting around on this shitbag franchise.

The follow-up:

It's Mike Brown. And not just Mike Brown, but his entire family. Good people? I don't know, I guess so. Good at running a football franchise? No. I can't keep this source of negativity in my life, it's like poison. I'm in a bad mood every Sunday. And for what? A team whose owner couldn't give two shits about my happiness?

I love football too much to abandon the NFL and wait out this latest roster rot Mike Brown invited onto this team. And once these players cycle through, we'll just be on to the next batch of scumbags and bad draft picks. 20 freaking years is a pattern, and it's long enough to stay in an abusive relationship. I've seen all I need to see.

I mean, I'm on my main Bengals message board talking about the Bengals' next coach, and we can't allow ourselves to even think about the team bringing in an established good coach? What kind of life is this? Being the underdog is great, but the Bengals don't play the game to win. Mike Brown doesn't play to win, he just plays to exist. He's stagnated and content to suckle from the teet of the teams that care enough to put a good product on the field. And I can't take it anymore.

I'm afraid my only option is to let the Bengals fanship go into hibernation and find a new franchise to roll with. That "B" is like a scarlet letter, and it's one I never deserved to be branded with. I don't live in Cincinnati, I never visit Cincinnati, I kind of hate Cincinnati. I have zero regional loyalty --- my home is (and will probably always be) in Virginia.

I have two kids now. I don't want them to hate football because they inherited the Bengals from their old man.

Post #3:

This process is both appealing and appalling.

I chose the Bengals after that Redskins game in the late '80s. Then they went to the Super Bowl and I was hooked. Then Paul Brown died. Then the Bengals started to suck, but I felt like I had to prove my loyalty by staying true. Then the 2000s came, Marvin Lewis came aboard, and this ship finally started to turn. Then that '05 playoff loss, and the rest is history. The realization that the ship never actually turned, that it was just a mirage. The realization that Mike Brown doesn't really care about winning, and that he doesn't really care about the fans. I haven't been to a game in Cincinnati in nine years, and I don't really have a pressing desire to make it happen. I can't really watch the Bengals on TV... and I don't care. I enjoyed watching Colts/Texans last night as much as I enjoyed watching any Bengals game (other than the Pittsburgh and Batlimore wins) last year. I can't help but be jealous of my friends that are Bears fans, Broncos fans, Panthers fans, and... yeah, I'll say it... Steelers fans. Because where I have a lie that tastes like hope, they have actual hope. Where I never dare to have expectations, they pile 'em on. Where I have been conditioned (like a badly beaten dog) to be feeble, they have the pleasure to be bold.

It's appealing to choose a new team. It feels like I'm finally a customer again, and the teams I'm looking at need to woo me.

But it's also appalling. Because if I quit on the Bengals now, I'm a quitter, and the concept of my loyalty is shattered.

But let's be honest here --- It's been a long time since this team has deserved its loyal fans. And that's a fact.

#4:

Okay, I've reached a decision.

I can't drop the Bengals. I'll never be able to. I just don't have it in me. So I'll ride out the rest of this season, hope the coaching search goes well, and hope we find the wisdom to dump some of these shitbags. But the Bengals are and will always be my #1 team.

Meanwhile, I'm going to continue my research and soul-searching, and find a team to adopt as my #1a.

I can follow two teams at once. I can do it. There are no rules that regulate against that.

And then I arrived at the Carolina Panthers.

My choice is the Carolina Panthers. Six main reasons:

1) A nice, easy, short 3.5 hour drive from CVille to a beautiful stadium in (what I think is) an awesome little city in an area I really like.

2) I've been completely dialed-in with the NFL since the day the Panthers franchise was conceived in 1993 and created in 1995. I've witnessed the organization's entire history. And I was right there pulling for them along the way when they beat the Steelers in '96, made the playoffs, and knocked off the defending-champion Cowboys. Then again when they went to the Super Bowl in 2003 as the Cardiac Cats. This team has knocked on the door, but it hasn't quite made it in. I like that about them.

3) They are basically at square one right now. The John Fox era is about to end, and at 1-6 and going nowhere fast, I'll be getting in at the beginning of a new era for the franchise. It is very important to me that I'm not portrayed as a cheesedick bandwagon jumper as I go through this process of choosing a new team.

4) The Rookie. I'm not going to lie about this --- I really wanted to choose a team that one of my good friends is already a fan of, so that we can discuss the team, go to games together, etc. As I realized that the Bears, Broncos, Ravens, Giants/Jets, Redskins, Steelers, and Cardinals wouldn't work, it left me with the Panthers. The fact that Rook is laying some roots (with a beautiful home where me and Jeff can crash) in Durham is icing on the cake.

5) On a basic, philosophical, fundamental level, I think the Panthers are about good defense and a strong running game. They are a new franchise with an old-school NFC feel, which I really like.

6) Jerry Richardson is exactly the kind of owner I like. He's an old-school type of guy. He's a former player who reveres the game, and he believes in hiring a football-savvy GM to run the football operations.

So there it is. I am now officially in my infancy as a Carolina Panthers fan.

That was on November 5th, 2010.  A month and a half later, I had a follow-up.

It's been almost two months since I made the decision to take the Panthers as my #1a. For all who care, here's a little status report on how things are going... (It's a numbered list, but items are presented in no particular order.)

1) I've had a great time learning about the Panthers history and ownership. I won't bore you with the details, but this is absolutely a "blood & guts" type of franchise. Plus, I now eat at Hardees a lot more often than I used to.

2) Oddly enough, becoming a Panthers fan has made me enjoy being a Bengals fan more than I ever have. I'm not sure if I can explain why, so I'll attempt a [potentially spotty] analogy: Married man loves his wife, but feels like she's getting too bitchy and feels stuck in the marriage. Man takes on a goomar (Sopranos for "mistress") who is a head case in her own right. Tasting the flavor of a new woman and experiencing her individual pros and cons makes the man appreciate some of the things he had begun to take for granted with the wife. Man, wife, and goomar live happily ever after. I'm not sure how this works exactly... but taking on a new team has helped me to change my point of view with the old team. I allowed myself the freedom and power to wander, and it led me back to where I began. I no longer feel stuck. It's like having a second child -- it makes you appreciate all sorts of stuff you took for granted with the first child. Et cetera.

3) Loyalty is a big deal to me. So I'm worried about how I will be perceived as a "two team fan." You guys are my friends, and I value and respect your opinions.

Why do I bring all of this up on Wahooze, my UVA sports blog?  A few main reasons:

1) I wanted to formally announce my Panthers allegiance to all of my other friends who are not part of the Cavalier Keeper League.

2) I wanted to give a little background on where I'm coming from before I add a bit more NFL content to the blog.

3) I want to attempt to recruit other "floaters" into hardcore Panthers fanship.  Doug, Keens... I'm looking at you guys.

4) I want to hear some feedback on how this process went down, and how I am now perceived by the football-loving public.  So please, post your comments below.  And don't pull punches.  (Post as "Anonymous" if you feel the need.)

5) How close is Virginia to being the college football and college basketball equivalent of the Bengals?  That's a much bigger blog post for a much longer day, but it's coming, so be ready.  (And for the record, I'll NEVER jump ship on Virginia.  It's my freaking alma mater.)